Ryan Nicol
Agriculture Commissioner Wilton Simpson isn’t letting big government get in the way of jolly St. Nick.
Simpson approved an emergency order waiving any and all state regulations through Dec. 25 that could delay Santa as he travels across the states delivering toys to children.
The order states that the Free State of Florida, “hereby known as the Free State of Christmas” shares “a deep and steadfast relationship” with Santa Claus.
The Florida Department of Agriculture and Consumer Services recognizes Mr. Santa Claus’ important mission of spreading holiday cheer,” the order continues.
“Mr. Claus holds a special place in the hearts of Floridians, both young and old. His impact transcends the boundaries of age, bringing joy, hope, and wonderment to all.”
Simpson’s order then touches on four areas of Florida law:
— “The requirements related to certificates of animal movement in the state pursuant to Chapter 585.08, Florida Statutes, is waived for Mr. Claus and his nine (9) flying reindeer.”
— “Claus is authorized to bypass any of the 23 agricultural inspection stations in Florida.”
— “Weight and size restrictions for loads on magical flying sleighs transporting services, presents for Florida’s good children, agricultural commodities, citrus, and any goods Mr. Claus may need during his time in Florida is waived.”
— “The Florida Forest Service, a division of the department that manages more than 1 million acres of state forests and provides forest management assistance on more than 17 million acres of private and community forests, welcomes Mr. Claus and his reindeer to any Florida State Forest and any fees or reservation requirements is waived.”
In addition, the Office of Agricultural Law Enforcement “stands ready to assist Mr. Claus in any way necessary to make his visit to Florida a memorable and joyous one.”
The order also notes that “Floridians are encouraged to leave Fresh From Florida treats out for Mr. Claus and his reindeer on Christmas Eve (December 24) to provide nourishment for their long journey.”
The order runs from Friday, Dec. 22 to Monday, Dec. 25.
8 comments
Earl Pitts "Sage Christmas Scholar Emeritis" American
December 22, 2023 at 7:19 pm
Sage wisdom Wilton,
Sage Wisdom Indeed. Mr. Simpson’s actions are in the best interest of all of Florida’s good little girls and boys.
We only can hope our Great State’s sage and economically wise actions will off-set the extra tax burdon Gavin Poosome’s Dook State of Dook-A-Fornia is imposing on Mr. Clause and maybe a few good boys and girls out there in Dook-A-Fornia will get some junk gift(s) from that Chink website Temu or maybe a nice rock which is a real rock and not just another dried out homeless +urd.
Thank you Mr. Simpson for saving Christmas for ALL Florida’s good little boys & girls.
EPA
Earl Pitts "Sage Christmas Scholar Emeritis" American
December 22, 2023 at 7:30 pm
Good evening again America,
Now it would be totally inappropriate for me, Earl Pitts American, to reply for Mr. Simpson …. so I wont ….. but in my mind alone I like to think Mr. Simpson might just crack a little almost undetectable smile at my Sage Words of Real Deal Wisdom if he thinks nobody is looking.
Thanks again Wilton,
Earl
Earl Pitts is a Convicted Pedophile
December 23, 2023 at 1:12 am
This is the time of year Earl dresses like Santa so he can trick more kids into following him back home to his trailer home where he rapes them.
Earl Pitts "Sage Voting Rights Scholar Emeritis" American
December 23, 2023 at 8:21 am
Good mornting America,
The above disgracefull post is instructive in that politically it is the typical morally bankrupt Democratic Party response.
WHAT YOU NEED TO KNOW:
The above style of morally bankrupt responses has been very effective in rallying leftist voters for the entire history of our Great Nation.
UNTIL:
Untill the lefty’s stupidally elected Biden and he totally phucked the whole jod of POTUS up to the point of no return.
IN CLOSING:
Thank God and His Son, Baby Jesus, that our choice this election includes Ron & Casey.
Earl Pitts American
Bruce J Fuentes
December 22, 2023 at 7:21 pm
Sounds pretty atheistic to me.
Earl Pitts "Sage Christmas Scholar Emeritis" American
December 22, 2023 at 7:37 pm
Sorry Bruce,
But your comment stinks of “Dook 4 Brains Leftism”.
You are hereby chastized and cancelled for being an Ugly Grinch That Stole Christmas.
Thank you Bruce,
Two Words Bruce:
Do Better.
Thank you smelly pookey head Bruce,
Earl Pitts American
Michael K
December 23, 2023 at 9:19 am
Is “Prancer” still allowed to particpate, given the anti-gay laws in Florida?
Asking for an elf friend.
Dont Say FLA
December 23, 2023 at 10:54 am
What if Santa needs an abortion?
Comments are closed.